Want to ask your
opinion on office politics. HR not very keen to take action towards the players
which create very negative energy. Where the staff can ridiculous fellow
colleagues publicly & without any punishment. If you are in my position,
what would you do?
Thanks for writing
in! Let’s deal with this in two parts:
first, what is bullying and where does it come from and second, why your
company isn’t dealing with it.
 |
| From Rebeccadevitt0 at Pixabat |
Bullying takes many
forms but classic systems include these behaviours:
·
Spreading nasty
rumours about someone
·
Laughing, jeering
and humiliating someone
·
Nasty name
calling
·
Yelling at
someone, especially in public
·
Not inviting
someone to a meeting they should be at
·
Not sharing
pertinent information with someone so that they can’t do their jobs properly
Bullying is often a
learned behaviour. Kids who go to a school where teachers allow bullies to run
wild, will become bullies themselves. Some do so after being victims while
others take to it without being victims.
Offices are exactly
the same. I’ve seen happy workplaces turn into hells because of one new senior
manager coming in and establishing a bully climate. It’s as if bullying is
somehow infectious.
Hierarchies are
involved too. Studies show that places with a strong top-down hierarchy are
more likely to have a bully climate than places that are egalitarian. Let’s
face it: the more power a boss has over staff, the more likely abuse is going
to take place.
Note: you may want to
look at Hofstede’s work here and examine the Power Distance scores for different
communities. Power Distance is a form of measuring how top down a hierarchy is.
Malaysia scores 100 compared to India at 77, Iceland at 30 and New Zealand at
22. So in Malaysia, bosses have lots of
power over staff, and this is why we have so many little Napoleons.
I don’t know what you
do or what your position is in your company, so I’m going to talk about what
can be done and who might be taking the action. Please read it and decide where
you fit in.
So, how do you make
changes?
Suppose you’re dealing
with someone who has only recently started bullying. To affect change, you need
to make a list of bullying behaviours, call the bully up on them and explain
what the proper behaviour should be.
For example, “Jane, on
Wednesday at the weekly meeting, you interrupted Sue. This is not acceptable.
We don’t interrupt others. You then laughed at her. This is not acceptable. We
do not laugh at others. You then made a nasty remark about her work. This is
not acceptable. We promote constructive criticism.”
Then you need to set
boundaries and a timeline for improvement. In my experience, a bully can’t be
fixed with a single chat or sending them off to a workshop. They will simply
give you the nod, and then go straight back to their usual behaviour.
Why is this? Here’s a
list:
·
They may not know
how to change
·
They may not know
exactly what behaviour is okay and what is not
·
They may find
bullying rewarding in terms of achieving goals, and they don’t want to give it
up
·
They may enjoy
bullying because it gives them a sense of power, and they don’t want to give it
up
·
They may think
that they can defy you
Bullies also often run
in packs, so they have plenty of peer support to keep up their unwanted
behaviour.
If you want change,
you need to provide re-training, supervision that assesses the change, and a
timeframe. Clearly, if the change is
not made within the timeframe, you have to let that person go. In other words,
the person who demands the change must also have the power of sanctions.
Who does the training?
If the bullying is a
consequence of learning, and simply bad communication and/or leadership style,
then you can work with someone with common sense who is a good teacher and
mentor.
You must have a proper
plan in place, though, that includes pinpointing problem behaviour, outlining
goal behaviour, describing how you will affect the change, and a timeline for
making the changes.
However, if the
bullying is a lifelong habit, then you may have a problem. You see, children from dysfunctional and
abusive families are often bullies.
If this is the case with your people, then
you need to address the underlying issues. In such families, cruelty, violence
and abuse are commonplace. As you might think, this is serious business and you
need a qualified therapist to tackle that.
If you are a
multinational, you should have properly qualified people on call who can help.
If not, you need to find someone and it will require a budget. I’m going to
suggest that you don’t do it in-house.
People need to be able to talk freely
about very personal, very painful things in their past. They can’t do so if
that person is someone they have to work with or see in the office.
Now the second part of
the question: why isn’t your company doing something about the bullying?
When bullies invade
the workplace, people who are good at their job simply leave and go and work
elsewhere. Those who stay become less effective because of the poisonous
atmosphere. In other words: bullies are very bad for business.
So why do companies
allow bullies to flourish?
Some do so because
they’re not interested in people. If the bullies contribute to the bottom line,
the company doesn’t care how they do it. They don’t care about high employee
turnover, either. If this is your company, I suggest you leave and find nicer
people to work with.
Some won’t confront
bullies because they’re afraid. Bullies work by intimidating people (remember
the list of how they work?) and sometimes even senior people are too scared to
stand up to them. That’s a problem.
If you think the place
is worth saving, and you have some standing in the company, you need to create a team atmosphere. Build a core of good people who support one
another. Then work to deal with bullying by documenting and reporting.
Some don’t tackle it because they’re not
good at their jobs. Senior managers are human, and they’re not all in their
jobs because they’re capable. If this is the case in your company, you need to
document and report.
How do you document? Document incidents
together with times, dates and witnesses. Tip: you might use the list of
bullying behaviours at the top of this response. Put it all together in a
report and go and see the manager responsible (or HR depending on how your
company works).
When you report, do not take the bully with
you! Do not take victims with you! As bullies intimidate victims, and victims
are often horribly humiliated by the whole situation, you need to talk quietly,
openly and rationally about the situation with someone who has the power and
authority to address the issue.
Good luck and let me
know what happens.
Have a question? During November 2016 I'm offering a free agony aunt service. Email me!
