 |
| Hooker in Johnson's Dictionary of the English Language (1755) |
If you’ve never worked with a therapist, you might think it’s a totally positive process that’s all about feeling better. However, therapy isn’t all sunshine and roses. In fact, the very nature of it often includes challenging discussions.
The benefits are huge:
- better about yourself,
- strengthening coping skills,
- improving relationships,
- and having a safe place to express emotions
but there’s a catch. Therapy involves risk because it helps you make changes in your life, and all change comes with risk. That’s just the nature of the beast.
Sometimes the risks are obvious. If you seek assertiveness training, you understand your relationships will change. Hopefully, this will be mostly positive, but you accept there may be arguments or resistance. But even seemingly innocuous goals can involve a shock. Here are two examples of the kind of unexpected risks that pop up:
Case Study 1: The Study Technique Shock
John wants to improve his study technique. Together we look into his learning style, energy levels, and how he manages obstacles. Seems harmless, right? However, suppose John strongly prefers to work alone? He may become anxious and stressed when discussing his approach to group work or team projects.
The risk here is simple: he discovers a skill gap that causes him stress, even though he only came in to learn how to highlight better.
Case Study 2: The Screaming Manager
Jane is depressed because she was fired. Her goal is to manage her depression, but while we’re examining what happened, Jane casually mentions that she’s been unpopular in every company she’s ever worked for. As we talk, Jane shares that she often screams at her subordinates.
And this is where the real risk comes in. If Jane was so stressed she didn’t even realize she’d behaved inappropriately, discovering this behavior can be a shock. We might talk more, and Jane might realize she’s doing this in her personal relationships too.
Why the Shock is Always a Good Thing
While I advise people of the risks, I tend to perceive this "risk" as positive because it’s always useful to gain insight. You may learn something new about yourself that surprises or challenges you, but you have the final decision about what to do with that information.
To go back to our examples: John might learn some skills that will help him with group work. He might also decide to avoid jobs requiring teams and opt for a career where he can work independently.
Jane might learn to manage her stress better so that she can build a better career path. Or maybe not! Jane might discover her partner doesn’t mind the odd screaming match, happily yelling back and seeing it as passionate foreplay. The point is, Jane gets to choose.
So in a nutshell, it’s part of good ethics to warn people about the risks involved in therapy. You may have a completely positive experience, or you may learn something new about yourself that surprises or challenges you. Whatever happens, you have the final decision in how you approach it.
Ready to embrace active change and be the best you? Message me today via email ellen.whyte@gmail.com or WhatsApp: +44 7514 408143 for your free 15-minute consultation.
